I want the last hillibillies to be educated about why today's youth is the abyss of humanity.
That the youth of today are spoiled and stupid is common knowledge. But there are always individuals who are disturbed by this fact. In order to spare us well-behaved, demonstrably decent and sensible pensioners eternal and unnecessary debates with the degenerated, useless, depraved and satanic brood of children of the atheistic rabble, I have taken the liberty of compiling a nice, short list of 5 reasons for the stupidity of the youth.
Lack of Respect
One of the main proofs for the youths stupids is the lack of respect for more intelligent (i.e. older) people. Young people are too stupid to understand that older people have more life experience than they do. Therefore, they do not have the nerve to follow the instructions and advice of older (i.e. more intelligent) people. Almost every 18-year-old I talk to thinks he knows everything much better than his parents and babbles incoherent nonsense about a round earth, a big bang, etc.
Masturbation
Another proof of my assertion is the self-rape of kids nowadays. Although masturbation blinds and sometimes even leads to death, young people play with their disgusting, unwashed genitals all the time! The LORD clearly says NO to masturbation!
[„Onan let it fall to the earth and perish. But the LORD was not pleased with what he did, and he caused him also to die. “ -Genesis 38:9-10]
Colloquial language
Then there's the use of impure and primitive language! Anyone who listens to two youths talking in a public transport after going to church wants to shout. "Hey dude, did you see that, man?" - "Yeah, dude, but I always say I'm not stupid' maaaan!" - "Umm, yeah, boii. I'm not stupid!!!" - The LORD says to use pure and clean language.
[„But then I will give the people clean lips, and they shall all call on the name of the LORD and serve Him with one accord.“ - Zefaniah 3:9]
Twilight
Every teenager between the ages of 6 and 24 thinks vampires are totally awesome. Teenagers are too stupid to realize they don't even exist and are maiming themselves with bat bites.
Teenagers are afraid in the dark. They know that they are not living according to the laws of the LORD and are afraid that demons might take possession of them in the darkness.
[„The LORD makes my darkness light“ - 2 Samuel 22:29]
I think it's clear now, why GOD hates youths.
Well, even though I have to admit that not all of them are that bad. For example there're a lot of polite, well mannered and laudable children in the Ark-Internet kids-corner.
Educating the stupid,
Payton!